Showing posts with label Funnies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Funnies. Show all posts

Work Routine

>> Saturday, July 17, 2010

I read some of my mates blog, and discovered that my blog's link was stacked down to the bottom of the page. Unsurprising, as I didn't keep my blog updated for few months due to "After Work Depressing Syndrome". Haha... That was a crap actually.

Speaking of my work, I do not have much story as working is just keeping loops circulating. Don't have much surprise for my daily routine:

6.30 am : Wakes up tiredly from bed. I sleeps more that I did in Cyberjaya but this is what I just can't explain.

7.10 am - 7.40 am : Drives from house and reaches company. Reaching early doesn't mean I start my work early, as trainees are not allowed to have desktops and I am basically borrowing laptop from company. Getting laptop from people who is late to work is troublesome. I never reach my office late, but there's once I reach office at 8.08 and that breaks my clean record.

8.30 am -8.45 am: Has short breakfast break in company. Breakfast food in canteen used to be nice last time, but not anymore ever since they changed the "service provider".

9.00 am -11.00 am: Starts my daily work. Occasionally, watching my colleague playing minesweeper. Haha ... I think she will see this eventually.

11.00 am - 11.45 am: Starts getting restless, emotionally flies to elsewhere, thinking of where to eat lunch.

12.00 pm - 1.00 pm: I separate this part into 2 parts here. Firstly, eating in company just takes us 15 to 30 minutes. The leftover free time are used to either having a small sleep, completing undone work, playing minesweeper or FB. Need not to say, eating outsides consumes traveling time, which all the unproductive actions after meals are traded for traveling.

1.00 pm - 4.00 pm: Continues my work.

4.00 pm - 4.45 pm: Everyone starts to think something else again. For me and another 2 trainees, we always think on how to spend the unfinished allowance on something like boxes of fruit juice. Why? Particularly it's because the canteen staffs always import those fruit juice in the afternoon, at the time that normally the canteen is empty. Another why? I just don't know the reason. Might have to ask them.

4.58 pm - 5.00 pm : OK, here i particularly stressing the time 4.58 pm as at that time, somebody is shutting down his laptop. Haha ... He just don't want to lost a single minute for the company and normally he is leaving at 5.00 pm, or sometimes 5.01 pm. For myself, I shuts down my laptop at 5 pm and leaves the office at 5.05 pm unless there are uncompleted tasks. However, suffice to say, leaving at 5.05 pm is the latest among the trainees, which makes myself to be understandably proud.

5.30 pm - 6.00pm: Reaching home in this range of time, depending on the traffic. From then, my real life starts :-)

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German in English Slides

>> Saturday, March 20, 2010


I just saw a German notes in the lecture slides of the Embedded System Design subject. A definite 0 to me if this is out in my exam. Lol.

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The Lecturer

>> Wednesday, June 24, 2009

The following script wasn't written by me, it's just a scene that I suffered from just few hours ago.

Date : 24-6-2009
Time : 6.00 pm - 8.00 pm
Venue: FOE CR2045
Characters: Student A, Student B, IS C ( IS stands for international student) , and the Lecturer ( I guess it's not proper to name him out, so I'll use the lecturer to represent him. )


The story started at 6.00 pm when The Lecturer came in. Everyone was restless, particularly those who has just attended Engineering Maths 5 class straight for 2 hours.

He started to explain the syllabus :

The Lecturer : Blah blah blah ... Ok now tell me what's Nyquist Sampling Theorem ? I remember I have taught you before.

Everyone started to look for the note.

The Lecturer : You? You? You? (Pointed to several students)

Everyone kept silent. Some of the students found the answer, which is fs > 2 fm.

The Lecturer : You don't give me equations. You are expected to explain the whole concept not just giving me what equals to what. It's a type of communication. You have to know how to communication with others. You, tell me what's Nyquist Sampling Theorem. (pointed to Student A)

Student A : Blah Blah Blah... (A simple equation of the takes over 20 words to describe it)

The Lecturer : It's not totally correct. Nyquist Sampling Theorem describes ......

He continued lecturing. About half an hour later,

The Lecturer :Blah Blah Blah ... To reduce quantization noise, you need large bandwidth or smaller bandwidth? You ? (Pointed to Student B)

Student B : Larger bandwidth.

The Lecturer : Why?

Student B : ....... ( Silence ) .......

The Lecturer : You know how to answer but you don't know how to explain? You come and sit in front.

Student B took his items and came to front seat grudgingly. The Lecturer then continued his teaching.

After for another half an hour, he gave us a short break for 10 minutes and then he continued.

The Lecturer : Blah blah blah ...... You all learned Analog Communication right? Now, tell me. What's the different between baseband signal and bandpass signal?

The class was in total silence again. Short after while,

IS C : Blah blah blah ...... ( Obviously he was trying to answer the question, but I don't understand what he was talking about.)

After IS C answered the question, The Lecturer smiled. IS C smiled too.

The Lecturer : What do you all think? Is it correct?

After a short while,

The Lecturer : Don't give me bull shit answer.

I noticed the face on IS C. Changed abruptly. Kinda insulting.

The Lecturer : Such a simple thing you all don't know. You all are future engineers, can't even answer a simple question like that. You all are year 3 student, without any basic knowledge. 20 years ago, a year 3 student knew much a lot than you do now. I don't know how you all going to pass your interview and get your first job next time. I don't know how will you survive next time. Don't expect your boss will spoon feed you with the solutions. The boss will give you the task and a deadline. You all have to complete the job no matter what way do you use.

I reckon that he has his point. But I guess it's not so hard to talk properly.

He continued. Until a page in the slides, he highlighted 2 paragraph and ask us to read and understand it. He said the paragraph has contained sufficient information on the next slide.

Short after this, he forwarded to the next slide. It's a graphical representation on Eye Patterns or Eye Diagrams.

The Lecturer : After reading the previous slide, do you know how to draw it ? You? (Pointed to Student B).

Student B shook his head and denied. He started to scold again.

The Lecturer : You all don't know English? You all can score 8As 10As last time, so proud, but you can't even understand a simple english like this. Last time our lecturer never teach this when I was in undergraduate. I have to read refrence books and I have to teach you now.

After another lecture for about 20 minutes, he finally released us. And that was the end of the story.

Though his criticism was justified, it was slightly harsh anyway.

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MMU in Google Adsense

>> Sunday, May 31, 2009


I just saw this last night. MMU advertisement in Google Adsense !

Though I saw tons of MMU advertisement in The Star (recently), I never expect MMU will contract with Google.

I guess they're just desperate for students.

Darn, it's funny !




P.S : Click to enlarge it

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J-English

>> Thursday, May 28, 2009




I'm not sure whether you guys saw this before or not, but it's truly entertaining. Enjoy it :)

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B is the new C

>> Thursday, April 16, 2009

Here's something to cheer you up before exams. Please click to enlarge it if you can't see it.



The student actually submitted this to his professor in a true/false exam. His professor sent him an e-mail the following day:

Dear Michael,

Every year I attempt to boost my students’ final grades by giving them
this relatively simple exam consisting of 100 True/False questions from only 3 chapters of material. For the past 20 years that I have taught Intro Communications 101 at this institution I have never once seen someone score below a 65 on this exam. Consequently, your score of a zero is the first in history and ultimately brought the entire class average down a whole 8 points.

There were two possible answer choices: A (True) and B (False). You chose C for all 100 questions in an obvious attempt to get lucky with a least a quarter of the answers. It’s as if you didn’t look at a single question. Unfortunately, this brings your final grade in this class to failing. See you next year!

May God have mercy on your soul.

Sincerely,
Professor William Turner

P.S. If all else fails, go with B from now on.
B is the new C

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A Tragedy

>> Tuesday, March 17, 2009

The Reverends Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton, while visiting a primary school class, found themselves in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings. The teacher asked both men if they would like to lead the discussion of the word "tragedy". So the illustrious Rev Jackson asks the class for an example of a "tragedy".

One little boy stood up and offered: "If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is playing in the field and a runaway tractor comes along and knocks him dead, that would be a tragedy." No," says the Great Jesse Jackson, "that would be an accident."

A little girl raised her hand: "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove over a cliff, killing everyone inside, that would be a tragedy." I'm afraid not," explains the exalted Reverend Al. "That's what we would call a great loss. " The room goes silent. No other children volunteered.

Reverend Al searches the room. "Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?" Finally at the back of the room little Johnny raises his hand. In a stern voice he says: "If a plane carrying the Reverends Jackson and Sharpton were struck by a missile and blown to smithereens that would be a tragedy." Fantastic!" exclaims Jackson and Sharpton, "That's right. And can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?"

"Well," says little Johnny, "because it sure as hell wouldn't be a great loss, and it probably wouldn't be an accident either!!!

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TMNUTs / Screamyx

>> Sunday, February 22, 2009

I was browsing through forums hope to get a temporary solution for my crappy internet. Was expecting to see something like ipconfig /flushdns. However, I saw one post which I'm particularly agree with. It sounds like this :

I've complaint to them many times (twice a month average) and below is 100% what they will reply :

1) Check telephone line quality -I'm sure my dog did not bite it
2) Bypass splitter/micro filter/fax machine/lightning protector. -I don't have any of those don't blame them.
3) Stand alone connection, from wall socket to modem (No parallel line). -It's a direct connection not more than 1 meter.
4) Flush DNS (Domain Name Server) -with cmd prompt not with water.
5) Switch off the modem, unplug/re-plug all cables, wait for 5 to 10 minutes before switching on the modem. - I will go cook 'indo mee'.
6) Create new dialer and configure DNS (Domain Name Server). -which with HIGH PING & HIGH % packet lost
- (Preferred DNS Server: 202.188.0.133/Alternate DNS Server: 202.188.1.5)
7) Clear Temporary Files, Delete Cookies and Delete Files under Internet Options. -Now they blame this.
8) Clear SSL Certificates (Internet Option).
9) Restore default browser settings. -Means do nothing.
10) Temporarily disable firewall settings. -Welcome virus.
11) Perform Windows scan. -Bill Gates they blame you now.
12) Temporarily disable anti virus software. -welcome too torjan.
13) Disable P2P application. -OMFG I can't even walk you say don't run.
14) Reboot computer and the modem. -check your socket fius also
15) Do a bandwidth test from our website.
16)Format your hard disk.
17)Buy a new PC.

CONCLUSION : they probably mean the broadband problem is cause by you or others, its not from TMNUTs or Screamyx.


The last 2 are ridiculous. I think the author was joking. Lol.

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Seat Belt

>> Wednesday, February 18, 2009


I just saw this in a website. Look how's this fellow fasten his seat belt in a plane. First time in the plane. Lol.

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Funny Valentine's Song

>> Sunday, February 15, 2009



Corresponding to Valentine's Day, everyone was forwarding this. So enjoy :)

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Retarded

>> Monday, November 17, 2008

My friend just sent me this clip few days ago. I'm posting it here, let you guys see how do the retarded fellows act. Anyhow, retarded fellows do offer jaw-dropping laughter's to us.

Stylish? Stupid? Idiot? Brave? or Deserving? Everyone please tell me what do you all think after watching this video clip.

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